May 30, 2026 · 48 min
A pastrami pilgrimage collides with NFL chaos
The Fifth Hour: Pastrami Queen
The episode turns a New York family outing, a deli misfire, and a revived football bit into an unusually revealing portrait of controlled disorder.
- 1A numb foot and painful shoes complicate a family day spanning the Met, Central Park, and Manhattan’s pastrami scene.
- 2Pastrami Queen delivers the episode’s central comic tension when a Swiss cheese and Russian dressing order meets a kosher deli.
- 3NFL Book’em returns with the Maller Hopper, replacing deliberate team selection with a ping-pong-ball lottery.
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Maller recounts the tense-but-resolved Pastrami Queen order after his wife requests Swiss cheese and Russian dressing at the kosher deli.
The brief
Ben Maller’s New York itinerary begins with a numb foot, painful shoes, and a family plan built around the Met, Central Park, and pastrami.
At the Met, Maller improvises his way through abstract art, relying on “interesting use of color” while imitating the behavior of museumgoers.
The food detour pits Katz’s reputation against Pastrami Queen, where an order for Swiss cheese and Russian dressing creates an awkward moment at a kosher deli.
With Anthony Bourdain’s endorsement in mind, the family eats near Central Park’s lake and castle; despite the physical discomfort, Maller calls it an unusually good day.
NFL Book’em returns after years away, now using the Maller Hopper to assign teams randomly and preserve the segment’s intentionally chaotic spirit.
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